Mid Air Masti......
Scene 1: Bangkok International Airport
Characters: Gang of brutes – Punjab de' sher,
Age: 35-45 From : Definitely Punjab
Purpose : God Knows if there was anything other than PATPONG
Scene 1: Bangkok International Airport
Characters: Gang of brutes – Punjab de' sher,
Age: 35-45 From : Definitely Punjab
Purpose : God Knows if there was anything other than PATPONG
Curtain Opens
Anticipated Flight Delay for AI309 – 1 Hr.
(Just done with my long trip and was waiting and wanting to get back home. After all I was going back to Delhi after long time, so any more delay was not accepted but again 1 – 2 Hrs here n there, I was ok with that!!)
(Intermittent Glossary –
Jatt:- Hard Core Punjabees – defying physical barriers – u can find in any packaging …unchhe... lamme.... gitthe.... patle... mote…mostly with PAUNCH WHICH THEY FLAUNT and anytime on for peg that too patiala – preferably muft ki ;-)
This is my tryst with destiny in pursuit of TRUE KNOWLEDGE and PARAM GYAAN, I am trying to reproduce the conversation but due to dying gray matter I may infuse some figments of my imagination….. (Pls dont confuse Jatt from Punjab to Jaat - this breed is from Haryana)
Jatt 1 (the innocent 30 something) : “ Flight ek ghanta late ho gayee …Air India da na koi bharooosa nai kitta ja sakda, hoon ki karange”
Jatt 2 ( The Geek…The Wizard…The GURU) :“Flight chahe late ho, pahunchaye time pe hi”
Jatt 1 : “Ae kivein”
Jatt 2 (WORDS OF WISDOM….): “Puttar ji hawai jahaaaaaaj chalda hai 1000 di speed tehh …OK… hun pilot 1000 di jagah 1100 ya 1050 tehh chala looga ….”panja sooo” (50-100) idhar udhar koi farak nai painda…..ek waari utte chad gaya tehh zara jaye speed adjust kar leega…. pahunchaye saanu time tehh hi”
Jatt1 : “Oye hoye… ai gal hai”
I was listening to this 11th Commandment from "Jatt2" …filled with tears of intellectual enlightenment I was looking around for a small place …a li’l bit of space…so that I can laugh my heart out…
It was sitting under the Bodhi Tree ….Bingo – Just now I witnessed basic laws of aviation … “Jai ho Jatt2”
Scene 2: AI309* (Somewhere between Bangkok and New Delhi …midair)
Characters Description: Same Gang of brute, Jatt Co. (as it was all of them)
Age: 35-45 ( dint u see above) From : Please check above
Purpose : There is definitely no other reason pls see aforementioned one!!
Debutante
Anticipated Flight Delay for AI309 – 1 Hr.
(Just done with my long trip and was waiting and wanting to get back home. After all I was going back to Delhi after long time, so any more delay was not accepted but again 1 – 2 Hrs here n there, I was ok with that!!)
(Intermittent Glossary –
Jatt:- Hard Core Punjabees – defying physical barriers – u can find in any packaging …unchhe... lamme.... gitthe.... patle... mote…mostly with PAUNCH WHICH THEY FLAUNT and anytime on for peg that too patiala – preferably muft ki ;-)
This is my tryst with destiny in pursuit of TRUE KNOWLEDGE and PARAM GYAAN, I am trying to reproduce the conversation but due to dying gray matter I may infuse some figments of my imagination….. (Pls dont confuse Jatt from Punjab to Jaat - this breed is from Haryana)
Jatt 1 (the innocent 30 something) : “ Flight ek ghanta late ho gayee …Air India da na koi bharooosa nai kitta ja sakda, hoon ki karange”
Jatt 2 ( The Geek…The Wizard…The GURU) :“Flight chahe late ho, pahunchaye time pe hi”
Jatt 1 : “Ae kivein”
Jatt 2 (WORDS OF WISDOM….): “Puttar ji hawai jahaaaaaaj chalda hai 1000 di speed tehh …OK… hun pilot 1000 di jagah 1100 ya 1050 tehh chala looga ….”panja sooo” (50-100) idhar udhar koi farak nai painda…..ek waari utte chad gaya tehh zara jaye speed adjust kar leega…. pahunchaye saanu time tehh hi”
Jatt1 : “Oye hoye… ai gal hai”
I was listening to this 11th Commandment from "Jatt2" …filled with tears of intellectual enlightenment I was looking around for a small place …a li’l bit of space…so that I can laugh my heart out…
It was sitting under the Bodhi Tree ….Bingo – Just now I witnessed basic laws of aviation … “Jai ho Jatt2”
Scene 2: AI309* (Somewhere between Bangkok and New Delhi …midair)
Characters Description: Same Gang of brute, Jatt Co. (as it was all of them)
Age: 35-45 ( dint u see above) From : Please check above
Purpose : There is definitely no other reason pls see aforementioned one!!
Debutante
Female Lead 1: Air Hostess – * Pls bear with me I need to explain this dame. She is 59 something babe …who is wrapped in Dark Red Sareee (even colorblind can recognize this one due to the sheer wavelength emitted) She was dark ….pitch dark…
Female Lead 2: Air Hostess – Exactly same as above …add ons were the glasses that could easily have given inferiority complex to Preity Zinta in Kal Ho na Ho ….. and awe inspiring pony tail ...Jus ready for VRS party
(*I prefer sleeping once onboard but this time there was this nice couple sitting next to me and they started conversation and I enjoyed there company, I was as it is bit restless to reach home asap…)
And than there was moment of glory …Ms Air Hostess opened the bar and served drinks …my fav gang asked for Whiskeeeey ….(btw I was almost 3 rows ahead of them) jus next to pantry!!
Jatt Co. asked for more liquor
Ms Air Hostess blatantly refused : - “ Nahin ab band ho gaya hai kisi ko kuch nahin milega” Yes these were her exact words….
Jatt Co. got up from there seats and made calculated moves like pawns on a chess board for a mission towards Pantry - Lethal than shock and awe !!
There was ultra chaos and mayhem …I saw Whiskeeeeeeey bottle …beer …vodka ….bottles being sneaked away.... It was drunken revelry …
Jatt Co to Ms Air Hostess : “ Snackkkkks milenege” (*mind you its not the same pronunciation ...its snackkkkkks...not Snacks)
Ms Air Hostess : “Aapko bola na sab band ho gaya hai”
Jatt Co. “ Aise kaise band ho gaya…ander pada hua hai…aap leke aaiye….”
Ms Air Hostess: “Badtameez ladies se baat karne ki tameez nai hai” (*eeeeeeeeeeekkkks)
Female Lead 2: Air Hostess – Exactly same as above …add ons were the glasses that could easily have given inferiority complex to Preity Zinta in Kal Ho na Ho ….. and awe inspiring pony tail ...Jus ready for VRS party
(*I prefer sleeping once onboard but this time there was this nice couple sitting next to me and they started conversation and I enjoyed there company, I was as it is bit restless to reach home asap…)
And than there was moment of glory …Ms Air Hostess opened the bar and served drinks …my fav gang asked for Whiskeeeey ….(btw I was almost 3 rows ahead of them) jus next to pantry!!
Jatt Co. asked for more liquor
Ms Air Hostess blatantly refused : - “ Nahin ab band ho gaya hai kisi ko kuch nahin milega” Yes these were her exact words….
Jatt Co. got up from there seats and made calculated moves like pawns on a chess board for a mission towards Pantry - Lethal than shock and awe !!
There was ultra chaos and mayhem …I saw Whiskeeeeeeey bottle …beer …vodka ….bottles being sneaked away.... It was drunken revelry …
Jatt Co to Ms Air Hostess : “ Snackkkkks milenege” (*mind you its not the same pronunciation ...its snackkkkkks...not Snacks)
Ms Air Hostess : “Aapko bola na sab band ho gaya hai”
Jatt Co. “ Aise kaise band ho gaya…ander pada hua hai…aap leke aaiye….”
Ms Air Hostess: “Badtameez ladies se baat karne ki tameez nai hai” (*eeeeeeeeeeekkkks)
yes this was it...this was the punch line ...And there were bitter arguments …. how can someone attack on nobility of Jatts
And than there was moment of reckoning ….Jatt Co united and pitched against Air Hostess for Snackkkkkks …she was stranded and asked for help from male stewards …
When scene became bit sour …few people got up in support of Ms Air Hostess…. And then there were two factions and then there were arguments and then there was heat and more heat ….and then the hell broke
People got up on there seats and “ teri maa …teri %$#%$” It was all happening …collars hands ..strong verbal assault all on Boing 737 ….Wallah !!!!
Than after sometime one or two got hit …don’t know which party but with time everything calmed down and when we landed airport cops were there for hooligans
This was the first time I witnessed fight even worse than DELHI DTC ….trip to remember …..!!!!
Once again …Jai ho Air India….. tehh punjabiyan di shaan wakhri !!!
And than there was moment of reckoning ….Jatt Co united and pitched against Air Hostess for Snackkkkkks …she was stranded and asked for help from male stewards …
When scene became bit sour …few people got up in support of Ms Air Hostess…. And then there were two factions and then there were arguments and then there was heat and more heat ….and then the hell broke
People got up on there seats and “ teri maa …teri %$#%$” It was all happening …collars hands ..strong verbal assault all on Boing 737 ….Wallah !!!!
Than after sometime one or two got hit …don’t know which party but with time everything calmed down and when we landed airport cops were there for hooligans
This was the first time I witnessed fight even worse than DELHI DTC ….trip to remember …..!!!!
Once again …Jai ho Air India….. tehh punjabiyan di shaan wakhri !!!
______________________________________________________________
posted by Ashish | 7:51 AM
8 Comments:
ultimate blog hai dude.. mazaa aa gaya pad ke.. bohot dino baad itna hansa hoo.. saala mere saath bhi exactly aisa hi hua tha bangkok ki flight pe.. sirf hatha pai tak baat nahi pohonchi thi.. - Jango
Awesome kissa yaar .. khoob hasaa main to. "Punjabiyaan di shaan wakhri" ..
Cheers - Kammy
sahi hai be...i too had a hard time with Tiklis in my 14 hr flight home (check out the latest post in my blog)
Rahul
Oye hoye.. ahem, maverick.. Kya baat hai mere, tom cruise ;-).
-Varun
Oye hoye.. ahem, maverick.. Kya baat hai mere, tom cruise ;-).
-Varun
You got great sense of humour....and the jats too...kkep it up dude....
HA ha ha ha ha ....Brilliant! This is too funny .. u really have great humor. Tusi bade Majakiya Ho ! he he he
Must say, u have great observation. Indian Airlines flights are indeed very entertaining specially, the hostesses. They totally remind you of “That’s 70’s show “ . I too went with 40 people from my office (mind u the humble Advertising fraternity) and they surely dreaded us ..coz when the hostess at Mumbai airport came announce the predicable 1 hrs delay …all 40 of us clapped …he he he . As we entered the flight the hostess with Vahida Rehman hairstyle (of the 70’s, considering Vahida Rehman has changed her style to adapt to changing times) welcomed us …we all tried hard to hold our laughter. But it's wasn't as funny as ur experience.
Cheers !
Payal
am laughing ear to ear, dude !!!
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